


Morituri Te Salutant

by eprime



Category: Harry Potter - Rowling
Genre: M/M, suggestion of non-con situations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-05-22
Updated: 2010-05-22
Packaged: 2017-10-09 15:52:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/89089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eprime/pseuds/eprime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tom Riddle was given a teaching job at Hogwarts back when he first asked for it. By the 1970s Hogwarts is just a little bit different.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Morituri Te Salutant

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I was contemplating the kink tags at pervy_werewolf and was somehow reminded of the [venom cock](http://wiki.fandomwank.com/index.php/Venom_Cock) mockery that went around several years ago. Next thing that popped into my mind was the obvious corollary that I know got mentioned back then--the poisonous arsehole. Wouldn't it be fun, I thought, if Voldemort was defeated, at least temporarily, due to the power of the poisonous arsehole? Instead of sitting down and writing a terribly amusing crackfic I decided I needed to try and write it straight. This is a brief snippet of a much darker Hogwarts that exists in great detail in my mind to try and help me maintain (not too successfully) my suspension of disbelief in writing this ridiculous scenario, but which will most likely never be written. (Just be glad the Riddle/Nagini/Lupin scene didn't make it in.)

"Lupin," Black said by way of greeting as the Ravenclaw prefect joined them.

Lupin nodded once. "Black. Potter."

Potter smiled grimly. "Have you heard, Lupin? Aubrey got caught with a mudblood. Punishment at meal tonight in the Great Hall."

"Who caught them? And why a public punishment? It isn't as if half of those in-bred idiots in Slytherin don't use Hufflepuff as their own personal harem." Lupin cast a look at Black. "No offense, Black."

Only Lupin could get away with making such a remark about Slytherin despite being a half-blood and a werewolf. He was a personal favorite of the Headmaster, hand-picked and personally invited to attend Hogwarts. Rumor had it that he'd been bitten by Greyback at the Headmaster's behest when he was only four years old. Most of the students were terrified of him, though his manner was deceptively mild and even relatively kind. Everyone knew better than to show him anything but a proper respect.

Black was one of the few who didn't fear him. Of course, he was a favorite himself and one of the most advantageously situated students in the school--heir of the House of Black, Head Boy, and with connections to make Old Slughorn weep with jealousy. He smirked, inclining his head sarcastically.

"None taken."

Potter cleared his throat to interrupt the look that was drawing out between them. "He wasn't just messing about. Word is he was getting serious. Pettigrew said he overhead him saying how much he loved her and that kind of thing. Little rat ran straight to the Headmaster, of course. Apparently, Longbottom's been seeing her on the sly for months."

Lupin whistled.

"Yeah."

"Who will be administering the punishment?" Lupin asked.

Potter looked at him without saying anything.

"Fuck. You?" Lupin breathed. "Why not your Head?"

"I got dressed down the other day by Scarecrow Carrow for not 'executing my responsibilities as prefect in a manner befitting the Headmaster's expectations'." Potter's voice mimicked the oily intonation of Gryffindor's Head of House with perfect accuracy.

Black and Lupin both quickly looked over their shoulders and stepped closer to Potter.

"Are you mental?" hissed Lupin. "Keep your voice down, and you don't want him to catch you using his name like that. It's not worth the risk for something so petty."

"He's right," Black said. "Play the game properly and then you can subvert it all you want."

"Thank you, Salazar." Potter gave them both a glare, but Lupin just watched Potter carefully. Black didn't think that anyone besides himself and Potter would be able to recognize the pity in his eyes.

"What will it be? _Crucio_ or the whip?"

"Muggle punishment to fit the crime, of course," Black sneered.

"What about the girl?"

Potter paled. "Expelled. She's to be taken out of the marriage pool. Made a permanent breeder."

None of them could hide their looks of mingled disgust and horror.

Lupin swallowed, deliberately looking over Potter's shoulder as if to watch the hallway for interruptions. "How are...the rest of the Hufflepuffs taking it?" He didn't mention Evans' name, but they all knew that was who he meant.

"They've been given another talking to reminding them of their proper place and good fortune to be here." Somehow Potter managed to keep his voice even. "All privileges revoked until further notice."

Black snorted. "At least that will give them some respite from my housemates."

They noticed Potter's fingers curling into tight fists but they ignored it. There was nothing they could do.

"There is a chance, Potter," Lupin finally said. "She's very smart. And powerful. You could be paired."

"I heard Snape wants her."

"Snape," Black scoffed.

"They have things in common," Potter said coldly. "Some think it's a good match. And he's a half-blood. You know how rare it is for a pureblood not to be matched with another pureblood or at least a half-blood three generations in on both sides."

"So," Black ventured. "We're still going ahead with..."

"Not here!" Lupin hissed. "Let's keep patrolling. Go over the list of infractions if someone comes by."

As one they casually separated, moving down the corridor and speaking in low voices.

"I am," Potter continued as if Black's question hadn't been interrupted. "I don't care what happens if it doesn't work."

"You might," Lupin said darkly. "It won't be a quick death for us if we fail. He'll want to make an example."

"We won't fail," Black said with all of his inherited arrogance.

"I want to do it soon." Potter's face was grim and determined.

"I suppose waiting won't do us much good, anyway," Lupin admitted, and more reluctantly said, "He'll be in a good mood tonight after the punishment."

Black and Potter both looked a little ill, and a tic started jumping in Black's cheek. Potter just shook his head. "I don't know how you stand it. Ever wonder what he looks like under the glamour?"

"As you may imagine, I try very hard not to think about that when he's buggering me up the arse," Lupin said dryly.

"Are you sure you're ready for this?" Black asked, his fingers twitching toward Lupin's wrist then falling away again.

"It's not as if I'm sacrificing my virginity," Lupin joked with a grim smile. "It's fine. I'm ready. If Potter has finished the potions."

Black wasn't amused but he just looked at Potter to see his nod of confirmation.

"What if he has someone else there?"

"He'll still want me tonight even if he does. It complicates things, but it doesn't change the plan. If it works, we'll obliviate anyone else and send them on their way. Then we'll go ahead with the rest of it. You'll drink the polyjuice and we'll call the professors in one by one. Then we take care of toerags like Mulciber and Avery. Once we control the school we can work out how to deal with everything else."

Without breaking stride, the three boys began to speak loudly of prefectly matters until they reached a hallway they made sure was empty before pacing back and forth in quick strides. When a door appeared in the wall they quickly entered.

"I've already bottled up some of the polyjuice. All it needs is the hair." Potter showed them the vials filled with muddy-looking liquid.

"Give them to Black before we leave," Lupin said. "He'll have to bring them in...after."

The three of them exchanged solemn glances for a long moment and then they burst out laughing in a fit of terrified mirth.

"Oh, Merlin," Black gasped. "I can't believe we're really going to off the fucking bastard."

"Quite literally," Lupin sniggered.

The hysterical laughter doubled until they were crouched over and hugging their stomachs.

"Shit. Shit, Lupin," Black groaned. "It's not funny at all."

"I know." Lupin straightened as the impassive mask crept back over his expression. "But I don't feel like pissing my pants or crying, so there you have it."

"We have to hurry," Potter warned. "We've been gone too long and I've got to report to Carrow for instructions."

"Right," Lupin said briskly. "I'll need your help to prepare me."

All three boys turned red and avoided looking at each other as they shuffled awkwardly.

"I'll do it," Black finally said, voice gone gruff and low.

"Right." Potter collected the vials and passed them to Black. "Don't mix them up."

He gave them a twisted grin and then pulled the startled boys into a brief hug.

"Ta for now, ladies." And with that he slipped out door leaving Black and Lupin to stare at each other.

Black spoke with unaccustomed hesitance. "How do you want to do this?"

"Put the gloves on." Lupin looked around the room. "I'll just take down my trousers and lean over that chair."

"No."

Lupin's eyes flew back to Black. "No?"

"Not like that." Black stepped forward and reached for Lupin whose eyes went wide and startled and scared as he took a step backward.

"There's--there's no time."

"There might not ever be," Black murmured, stepping forward and pushing Lupin backward until he was up against the wall. "Let me at least kiss you. Just once. Please." Lupin nodded mutely.

Black pressed his mouth against Lupin's, a light dry kiss that belied the years of wanting but not daring to touch. And then their lips parted and their tongues slid inside and together, and they were tangling fingers in each other's hair to pull their mouths closer and closer until their lungs were desperate for air.

Lupin broke away first, chest heaving as he leaned against the wall and stared at Black wildly.

"We could leave," Black whispered. "We could do it. Just run instead."

Lupin shook his head, eyes dark with longing. "You don't mean it."

"I want--" Black began, lifting trembling fingers to touch Lupin's face.

"I know. I _know_." Lupin's voice was shaking. "After."

Black nodded almost imperceptibly.

"Hurry," Lupin murmured, and without hesitating he turned, unfastening his trousers and letting them drop to the floor. Black pulled on the gloves and opened the vial Potter had given him. Lupin made a choked off sound as the slick finger slid between his cheeks and circled around the pucker of his arse. Lupin spread his feet wider and pressed his palms against the wall.

Black's ungloved hand gripped Lupin's hip tightly as he worked his finger inside. Lupin's breathing sounded heavy and ragged in the quiet room. The only other noise was the wet sounds of Black's fingers carefully coating the insides of Lupin's arse with the first potion.

"I think that's good," he said softly, after he'd twisted two fingers inside and probed up as far as he could manage.

"You _think_?" Lupin huffed out a dark laugh. "I suppose if you're wrong at least I won't be around for the fall out."

Black didn't laugh. "I don't like this part of the plan."

"You know it's the only way he's ever vulnerable. He doesn't allow wands near him and he's protected against most known spells anyway."

Black was silent.

"We should count ourselves lucky he's got a thing for dark creatures. You should see how fond he is of that snake he brought back the last time he was away."

"It's not funny."

Lupin sighed. "Look, Black, it's nothing I haven't done before. Just...get on with it."

Black frowned as he opened the second vial and scooped out a generous amount of the mixture. "Are you sure?" he asked, raising his eyes to Lupin.

"Do it."

Biting his lip, Black pushed his fingers inside again, holding his breath as Lupin shuddered.

"All right?" he whispered, adrenaline and awful fear churning in his belly.

"Yes," Lupin hissed. "Add more."

"Won't..." Black swallowed down bile. "Won't he notice?"

"Yes. But I always prepare myself before. He expects it." Remus choked back a groan as Sirius scissored and twisted his fingers.

"Fuck," Sirius whispered. "Am I hurting you?"

"No." Lupin's dark laugh came again. "You don't know how many times I've thought of--of you..."

Black felt the blood rising like heat up his throat and across his cheekbones, and he took a shuddering breath before gently sliding his fingers out of Lupin and carefully peeling off the glove. A quick _incendio_ destroyed it, and then his hands were on Lupin's hips again, urging him around.

"Oh," he breathed.

Lupin's erection was jutting out from his body and there was no possible way Black could stop himself from flicking his tongue out and just letting it touch the glistening tip. The taste spread over his tongue as Lupin gasped. Black would have sucked him down to the root without thought if Lupin hadn't gripped him by the hair and tugged him up. "You can't," Lupin moaned. "You can't. We have to go now."

He shoved Black away and reached for his trousers. "You go first," he said quietly as he fastened and straightened his clothing. "Go now."

"Remus," Black said, and Lupin raised startled eyes to stare at him.

Black offered him a lopsided grin then pulled him in for a swift kiss. "For luck." And then, like Potter, swiftly disappeared through the door. For a moment, Lupin stared after him then he squared his shoulders and left the room without a backward look.

He didn't notice the twitching of the troll tapestry across the hallway or Pettigrew peering speculatively at the disappearing door. When Remus turned the corner at the end of the corridor, Pettigrew emerged from his hiding place and followed.


End file.
